You got it bad
by Shinikami Dragon
Summary: Neji's P.O.V. Slight Angst. One sided NejiHina. Neji thinks about how he lost her...he loved her and wished he could get her back, but life was never fair... all he has left is memories...


Sandra: From now on, I think I'll stick to one shot fanfic. So here's another.  
  
Listen to this fanfic whilst listening to Usher's Song: You got it bad.  
  
Neji's P.O.V.

* * *

**_Oh, no, no, no, no, no... _**

**_When you feel it in your body _**

**_You found somebody who makes you change your ways _**

**_Like hanging with your crew _**

**_Said you act like you're ready _**

**_But you don't really know _**

**_And everything in your past - you wanna let it go_**  
  
I threw my kunai pouch onto the desk as I dropped onto my bed, taking in a deep breath, I finally completed the mission, I sat up and ripped off my shirt, looking at all the cuts over my chest, running my hand gently over the cuts, I winced.  
Getting up, I went to the medical cabinet and pulled out the ointment which I started to apply on, causing myself to wince again.  
  
It used to never hurt, not when she helped me… I winced as I rubbed the ointment a bit to harshly onto my skin.  
I never really appreciated it when I had it, not at all at the beginning, then I started to…  
  
I looked up at the ceiling and thought about her… I really miss her…  
  
**_I've been there, done it, fucked around _**

**_After all that - this is what I found _**

**_Nobody wants to be alone _**

**_If you're touched by the words in this song _**

**_Then baby..._**  
  
I always acted like I was independent, I needed no one but myself, but I was wrong…

Ever since I let myself feel, let myself see the truth… I want to be loved and held just like everyone else does…  
  
I put away the ointment and went to grab the bandages and wrapped my chest, grabbing a clean shirt, I slipped it on and once again, fell onto my bed, and waited, with hope…  
  
**_U got, u got it bad _**

**_When you're on the phone _**

**_Hang up and you call right back _**

**_U got, u got it bad _**

**_If you miss a day without your friend _**

**_Your whole life's off track _**

**_You know you got it bad when you're stuck in the house _**

**_You don't wanna have fun It's all you think about _**

**_U got it bad when you're out with someone _**

**_But you keep on thinkin' bout somebody else _**

**_U got it bad_**  
  
The phone rang and I jumped, startled, before I rushed to the phone and picked it up.  
"Hello?" I said calmly.  
"Neji-kun." The voice I wanted to hear for so long.  
"Hinata-chan." I breathed more than said.  
"How are you?" She asked, I smiled and took the cordless phone to my room and sat on my bed.  
"I'm fine." I said, lying down.  
"You had a mission today didn't you? How was it?" She asked, I can almost see her face appear on my roof.  
"A few cuts here and there, I'll be fine." I said, reaching towards my roof only the image disappeared.  
"Make sure you applied the ointment. Make sure you clean your cuts…" "Hinata-chan, I'm fine. I did as you've told me from before." I said, grinning, how much she feels concerned.  
  
And we stayed there, talking about anything and everything, until finally…  
  
"How's my father?" She asked, I sighed.  
"He's fine, Hinata-chan, why don't you call him?" I asked her, it's been over 5 years.  
"I can't Neji-kun…" I know it was hard for her.  
"It's ok." I said, rubbing my eyes and stifled a yawn, but she must've heard it as she giggled.  
"I think I should let you get some rest." I grinned.  
"Yeah…" "Bye Neji-kun." "Bye Hinata-chan." I said, I was about to say one more thing when she put down the phone. I put the phone down beside me and looked out the window beside my bed.  
  
**_When you say that you love 'em _**

**_And you really know _**

**_Everything that used to matter, don't matter no more _**

**_Like my money, all my cars (You can have it all back) _**

**_Flowers, cards and candy (I do it just cause I'm...) _**

**_Said I'm fortunate to have you girl _**

**_I want you to know I really adore you _**

**_All my people who know what's going on _**

**_Look at your mate, help me sing my song _**

**_Tell her I'm your man, you're my girl _**

**_I'm gonna tell it to the whole wide world _**

**_Ladies say I'm your girl, you're my man _**

**_Promise to love you the best I can_**  
  
I really can't believe all of this… I really did love her, yet, since I was young, I felt it would go, then it grew, so I tried to fight it away, taking it out on her…

Then, I realised, there was nothing I can do, so I spent most of my teenage years making it up to her, gaining her trust, and most of all, tried to gain her love.  
And I succeeded, we was together, so much love and happiness, then… Her father found out, and cause of that, I took my branch family duty into consideration and started to doubt my relationship with her, and cause of that, we fought, we didn't speak for so long, and during that time, I realised that I loved her and needed her more than life itself.  
But, when I apologised and asked for her to take me back, I was too late…she found another… her first love, the blonde, Naruto. I was beyond angry and felt like I was being betrayed, yet, I wanted her to be happy, and for that, I spoke with Naruto and told him, treat her well, never hurt her or he'll die.  
He promised me, he'll treat her well, and love her more than ever.  
That's all I can do, stand in the shadows and watch her and Naruto go on with life together, happily in love.  
  
Yet, I know she still loves me, it's those feelings and connection that you can't break, I was her first everything, you just grow a bond from those things, I can feel the connection every time we look into each others eyes, every time we make contact.  
  
But, she still stays with him… And leaves me in the cold all alone…  
  
**_See I've been there, done it, fucked around _**

**_After all that - this is what I found _**

**_Everyone of y'all are just like me _**

**_It's too bad that you can't see _**

**_That you got it bad...hey_**  
  
When Naruto asked you to marry, I was in the shadows watching you the way you smiled and gasped, before breaking into tears, how you threw yourself at him, it hurt me, stabbed me with every tear that fell from your eyes. That was the only time I was never your first.  
When you told me, I was in my room, you came to me, hugged me, and I couldn't control myself, I needed to feel you, just one more time…before I lose you for good.  
I kissed you, and you let me, holding onto me, kissing me back with as much eagerness as I do. The way we kissed, the way we nipped, how our clothes seem to fall piece by piece as we made love for the last time, forever grated into my mind. I'll never forget those three words you whispered before you fell asleep.  
  
I groaned and looked at the phone beside me, picking it up, I dialled your number.  
  
**_U got, u got it bad _**

**_When you're on the phone _**

**_Hang up and you call right back _**

**_U got, u got it bad _**

**_If you miss a day without your friend _**

**_Your whole life's off track _**

**_You know you got it bad when you're stuck in the house _**

**_You don't wanna have fun _**

**_It's all you think about _**

**_U got it bad when you're out with someone _**

**_But you keep on thinkin' bout somebody else _**

**_U got it bad_**  
  
"Hello?"

"Hinata-chan?"

"Neji-kun? What's wrong? We spoke barely 10 minutes ago."

"I forgot to say something."

"What is it?" As if the scene from our final night ran through my brain, I never got to say it to you before you fell asleep, before you left me…

"I love you."

"Neji-kun…"

"I love you more than anything Hinata-chan…"  
  
**_breakdown _**

**_U got, u got it bad _**

**_When you're on the phone _**

**_Hang up and you call right back _**

**_U got, u got it bad _**

**_If you miss a day without your friend _**

**_Your whole life's off track _**

**_You know you got it bad when you're stuck in the house _**

**_You don't wanna have fun _**

**_It's all you think about _**

**_U got it bad when you're out with someone _**

**_But you keep on thinkin' bout somebody else _**

**_U got it bad_**  
  
"Please Neji-kun, don't do this…"

"I can't stop thinking about you. It's been over 5 years…"

"Neji-kun, please…I'm married now…"

"I know but Hinata-chan…I can't stop, it's driving me crazy! Everyday, I would wait for you to ring me, to hear your voice…I don't even see you anymore!"

"Neji-kun! Please! Stop! I have a child now."

"I…"

"Just stop please…"

"I just want to say…"

"I heard enough Neji-kun…"

"I…"

"We can't resume what we had before, it's over now, stop making it harder for me please. I love Naruto, and now we have our child, there is no turning back…"

"…"

"Sorry Neji-kun, I have to go."

"I love you…" I whispered into the phone as the sound of the dial tone went off, a single tear slipped from my eye as I dropped the phone and closed my eyes.  
  
**OWARI**

* * *

Sandra: I wanted to make this a HinaNeji, but this song don't go with it, so this is the best I could do it. In a way, it's a HinaNeji, and slightly NaruHina.  
  
I'm sorry! 


End file.
